This show just gets worse and worse and worse. I don’t even really want to write about it, so we’re just going to run through this real quick.
First, Bentley shows up. And all the teasers make it look like Ashley lets him back in the game. We all know how full of shit the producers are though, so I don’t even get my hopes up. They meet in one of the hotel rooms and he sits there with that smug asshole grin on his face the whole.
He doesn’t give her much, but enough for her to figure out that he doesn’t have feelings for her. She’s like, “Why would you fly here then?” And I wish he would’ve just been like “Because they paid me, duh.”
After she goes through some anger at Bently, she lets it go (only not really because she brings him up about every 3 minutes and how OVER him she is). Then it’s time for the first one-on-one date with this dude:
It’s possibly the most boring thing I’ve ever sat through (that’s not true, I watch Treme and The Killing). He gets a rose for almost no reason.
Next day is the Detour group date. Can you say “filler”? The dudes have to go out and recruit normal people to paddle their stupid white asses around. I can’t believe they get anyone to help. After the “race” they all go to a generic hotel bar that they’re all strangely impressed by.
Ames and Ashley molest each other in the elevator but then Ryan ends up getting the rose. Which is hilarious because the guys HATE Ryan. Like really, really hate him.
They’re all on the verge of quitting after he gets the rose.
The next night it’s time for Ashley’s one-on-one date with JP. Which goes really well. Boring as hell. Goes well. JP is probably the only guy on the show that I’d want to hang with. I want him to win so he’ll “win” but I also kind of want him to lose so he can find someone better. Ashley tells him about Bentley and he’s pretty chill about it.
Because telling JP about Bentley went so well, she decides to tell ALL of the guys. Why? I don’t know. They don’t take it nearly as well (especially after Ryan got the rose) and we get the best part of the episode—all the dudes questioning her and telling her how disappointed they are and pretty much just being mean. It’s awesome. Mickey’s so pissed about it he quits. Slow clap for Mickey, everyone. I almost feel bad for making fun of his weird mouth.
Time to hand out some roses. Since Mickey already quit just one lucky dude is spared a fate with Ashley. It comes down to Ames, who dry-humped/tongue-raped Ashley in an elevator, and Blake, who never had a one-on-one and made her feel like shit over Bentley. For some reason they edit it dramatically like we don’t know which she’ll pick. The fact that Blake is ACTUALLY a dentist, and not just a student pretending to be a dentist, makes her feel inadequate, so she sends him home.
That’s it for this week. I can’t believe a show that is TWO hours every week can possibly move this slowly. There’s like 20 episodes left. The Voice was like, 5 episodes total. Anyway, next week the crew is off to Taiwan. Hopefully they will do absolutely nothing specific to that island like they did this week.
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